Janet

Something strange happened to me in St. Vinnie's today, so strange in fact that it completely eclipses the need to discuss the small items that I picked up. Instead, I'm going to tell you about Janet.

I was moving across the store to check out a shelving unit near the front and barely noticed an elderly woman standing near the Coke machine looking a bit awkward. My attention was on the items on the shelves, so I was surprised when I turned to walk away and she was moving towards me.

"Can you get me a couple bottles of pop?" she asked me nonchalantly, sticking a few dollar bills into my unsuspecting hand. She was tiny, probably three heads shorter than myself.

I stood there for a couple of seconds, my mind completely blown. It's not often old women ask grown men with shaggier-than-average hair carrying around toys for favors After being dazed for a few seconds, I figured it best to just go with it. "What kind of pop?"

"Hmm, let's see. I'll take a Sprite." She thought carefully. "And a regular Coke. Here, I'll give you fifty cents for the change." She reached into her purse, pulling out two quarters.

I sunk one into the machine, along with one of the dollar bills. "Sprite you said?"

"Yes."

I pushed the giant "Sprite" button on the machine, still a bit mystified. It was when the bottle popped out that Janet revealed her true intentions.

"Can you open it for me too please? Both of them."

"Sure," I said, but when I started to twist the cap I could see the fizz rising. "I'm going to let this sit a minute," I told her. "I don't want it to fizz all over."

"You'll have to do it very slowly," she told me authoritatively.

I set it down and purchased the Coke. The Sprite opened fine, but sure enough the Coke threatened to erupt all over the place. I opened it slowly, like the woman requested. I realized she had given me an extra dollar. A tip! I stuck it into my pocket.

"Thank you so much," she told me.

"Oh." I laughed. "It was no problem."

"I'm Janet," she said, smiling and looking up at me like a flirty school girl.

I laughed a bit nervously. "Nice to meet you. I'm Josey."

"Josey," she repeated. "Nice to meet you." She then sauntered off into the back room. I decided it was time to go, paid for my couple items and left.

Basically, Janet really just caught me off guard. I don't think she was crazy or anything like that, but she needed a hand and for some reason picked me as a prime candidate. Being a grocery store veteran, I'm used to filling odd requests for the elderly and wasn't too blown away. Regardless, it was an interesting experience within the walls of St. Vinnie's that I found proved more interesting than any material items I might have found. I'm sure there are some philosophical implications to this event, so I'll have to dwell on it awhile.